Are You Listening?

It was May of 2017; I took a new job and moved out of the area to work for a resort in another part of the state. Shortly after my move, I published a blog post titled “A Rite of Passage.”  The blog post was about my limiting beliefs and how I moved through them to stand up to my fears and the changes I’d made.

Although there were many good reasons why I had been looking for a new job within my career field as a health and fitness professional, those reasons didn’t withstand the test of time or the instincts that told me not to take the job in the first place.

Accepting the position and realigning my career path brought excitement about the job offer and all that it entailed. However, my thinking brain took over, and I rationalized all the so-called “good” reasons. My heart tol

d me otherwise and was not in alignment with my brain’s way of thinking.

From the words of the British Poet Lord Byron, “There is no instinct like that of the heart.”

The good news, I tested the waters, dealt with my fears, and gave it my all, my heart was ready to bale on the resort and head back hom

e. I had trodden the murky waters, faced the unknown, dealt with my fears, learned a great deal about myself, so it was not all a loss, and I even found some peace along the way.

Bottom line, the job wasn’t anything that I thought it was going to be, and I found myself realigning my goals once again and preparing for another marathon of changes.

So, after what felt like an eternity, I m

oved back to my hometown of Vancouver, WA, to another new apartment, another job (not in my field), and, most importantly, to my family.

What was it finally that helped me to recognize my heart’s instincts and not just stay stuck in my brain’s overwhelming power or sense of control?

  1. I dove deeper into my heart
  2. I listened to what it was asking. Not allowing my emotions or thoughts (brain) to override my intuitive senses.
  3. I checked in with values. Were my values in alignment with this job?
  4. Was the job meeting my temperament type?

I was already on my way to making the best decision I could make for myself when I came back home for a quick visit, notice the word “home.” I could never think of my new place as home. The visit was just after the shootings in Vegas. When I arrived for my visit, my granddaughter ran and jumped into my arms, wrapped her arms and legs around me, placed her head on my shoulder, and said, I missed you, Nana.”

Sold – My family was more important than any job I could take anywhere.

That act of love gave me the kick I needed to change gears and head back to where I belonged.

It was not about feelings or emotions; it was about instinct and the perfect timing of love showing me my path had taken a detour, and I could get it back on track.

  1. What holds you back or keeps you from moving forward?
  2. What do you instinctively know to be true, and yet, you struggle to trust your instincts to guide you?

What I am asking is: Are you listening?

If you would like to explore this idea of trusting your heart’s instincts, you can reach out to me, and I would be happy to assist in listening to your HEART!

As a life coach, I’m always working on ways I can help women to achieve success both personally and professionally. With education and teaching being one of my top values, I need to make an impact and help others. To provide the best possible service to my clients and to help them achieve their dreams and goals is rewarding and makes my heart sing.

One of the workshops I have hosted the past two years does just that. It’s called Look Back/Look Forward and this year we not only looked back on 2019, but we reflected on the last decade. The process is around what we learned, what we were proud of, what we accomplished versus what we were lacking in, or didn’t do.

The entertaining part of the workshop this year was the horses. Elliott Horsepower Ranch, where the workshop was held, has a viewing room and arena that were perfect for our classroom. With the heat on and window open, the horses were poking their heads in the window and showing a lot of curiosity for the participants and providing support during coaching experiences.

Once done with the review portion of the workshop, we dove into the next decade and what top goals to set for 2020. What goals would we set, what tools would we need to accomplish the goals, who do we have to become to achieve the goals? More questions – what character traits will you need, and what habits or skills do you need to develop or strengthen to make your dream happen?

I know so many questions, and not all of them easy to answer. It truly is a reflection and a mindset for growth.

One of the participants had recently relocated to a new barn and desired to achieve more horse experiences and create more friendships with like-minded horse ladies in 2020. We set time aside for a coaching session with Cody. He offered a great deal of love and support to her as she processed through creating new friendships. With the many demands of work, how could she find a work/life balance that would give her the desired time she wanted with her horse? Together, we came up with some reasonable solutions and ways to overcome obstacles that might interfere.

Work/life balance seems to be a common thread with many of the women I coach. If you’re at all searching for some answers or still trying to figure out what you want this next decade to look like talk to your horse. Let them be your coach.

Get into a round pen with your horse. Ask yourself some of the hard questions you don’t seem to have an answer for. Get centered in your body and start walking counterclockwise. Without demanding your horse follow or without a lead rope just start walking. Let him/her connect with you and help you facilitate the answers. Here’s how, if you aren’t honest with yourself and staying in your body and get out of your head, your horse won’t connect. If you do, they will follow. When you stop being centered and, in your body, they will disconnect, step in front of you or do many other things to get your attention. Be with your horse and let them, coach. Listen to the subtle cues they give you.

If you find yourself still not sure, reach out and let a coach help your horse facilitate the coaching process or come on over to my barn and let Cody help me help you.

If you’d like some of the questions I provided during the workshop, reach out to me at, I’d be happy to send them over to you.

Happy New Year, Vonie